[He regrets asking-- or rather, just saying anything. John explains it but he doesn't like the explanation. He doesn't like it laid bare that he was stupid enough to trust, and then even more stupid so as to feel betrayed. He wants to run as far as possible from that. He wants to scream.]
Everyone's like that. That's part of learning. Mistakes are made. I can't afford to be so careless. I'll know better next time.
She'll probably have to get used to that when we get home too. She should know from the start. I just need to make sure she doesn't get involved again. She can't go around trying to defend me, it's dangerous.
I don't know why anyone would freak out over that of all things with Stephen. I'm not even human. He obviously wouldn't do that to Emily or someone. It's a whole thing, it's the same back home, the target has to be something justifiably undesirable according to a human conscience. The idea of him becoming an indiscriminate hunter is ridiculous.
I don't know what I'm supposed to do now.
So that's that then, right? It's fine? It's fine now. That's how this works.
[John's not going to comment on the 'lesson' in all of this. It's not in place.]
People freaked out because you look and act like a teenager. That means most people here view you as a child. It doesn't matter that you're not human. There are a lot of non-humans here. There's even a non-human child like that little goat boy. It doesn't matter what you are. You're perceived as a child. That means you're not as culpable in this as the adults involved like me and Stephen. Whether that's right or wrong, it is what it is here. People saw Stephen agreeing to fight a child. That's all that really matters to them.
This works however you want it to work. It doesn't have to be fine. Like I said, I'm not looking for anything from you. If you'd like me to leave you alone, I can do that. If you'd like to talk to me, you're welcome to. It's up to you. You're the person who's been wronged, not me.
That's stupid. Been fighting older people in battle and winning wars since we were fifteen. No one back home thinks like that. Maybe if they knew what I really looked like they'd change their tune.
I don't know. I don't know what I want. That all sounds... sentimental. And I'm not. I would rather it was fine. I don't want to care about all this.
Have you met people like Eliza? Fair certain she'd try to make friends with Killinator of the Scorpion People Murder Race if he showed up here. What you look like is what you look like for now, so unless you want to go ask Zephyr for a change, you're sort of stuck like this.
And we can just stop talking about it. I reckon it's going to be hard to just make yourself stop caring, though. I've tried that. Never works out how I'd like.
no subject
on 2018-09-10 12:37 am (UTC)Everyone's like that. That's part of learning. Mistakes are made. I can't afford to be so careless. I'll know better next time.
She'll probably have to get used to that when we get home too. She should know from the start. I just need to make sure she doesn't get involved again. She can't go around trying to defend me, it's dangerous.
I don't know why anyone would freak out over that of all things with Stephen. I'm not even human. He obviously wouldn't do that to Emily or someone. It's a whole thing, it's the same back home, the target has to be something justifiably undesirable according to a human conscience. The idea of him becoming an indiscriminate hunter is ridiculous.
I don't know what I'm supposed to do now.So that's that then, right? It's fine? It's fine now. That's how this works.
no subject
on 2018-09-10 12:44 am (UTC)People freaked out because you look and act like a teenager. That means most people here view you as a child. It doesn't matter that you're not human. There are a lot of non-humans here. There's even a non-human child like that little goat boy. It doesn't matter what you are. You're perceived as a child. That means you're not as culpable in this as the adults involved like me and Stephen. Whether that's right or wrong, it is what it is here. People saw Stephen agreeing to fight a child. That's all that really matters to them.
This works however you want it to work. It doesn't have to be fine. Like I said, I'm not looking for anything from you. If you'd like me to leave you alone, I can do that. If you'd like to talk to me, you're welcome to. It's up to you. You're the person who's been wronged, not me.
no subject
on 2018-09-10 08:13 am (UTC)I don't know. I don't know what I want. That all sounds... sentimental. And I'm not. I would rather it was fine. I don't want to care about all this.
no subject
on 2018-09-10 02:09 pm (UTC)And we can just stop talking about it. I reckon it's going to be hard to just make yourself stop caring, though. I've tried that. Never works out how I'd like.
no subject
on 2018-09-11 10:13 pm (UTC)[He'll just not mention that's he's already been vying for his power back.]
...No. It never really works like that for me either. Despite certain factors.
Lets more or less pretend this didn't happen then. I can work with that.
no subject
on 2018-09-11 11:04 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2018-09-11 11:07 pm (UTC)Have fun babysitting.